Oh hey there.
So, we’re all pretty aware now that parenthood changes you in more ways than one. I’m not talking the usual ‘woah doesn’t being a parent make you a little boring’ or the bog standard ‘shit, being tired is like a part of me now’.
I’m talking real personality changes. Like for me, the ability to have an adult conversation about world events and general stuff doesn’t come as natural like before. Now it’s all The baby had THE worst nappy this morning and Mate I’m so tired the kid has given up day time naps, AGAIN.
Y’know the worst one for me? Timekeeping. I swear to the high bloody heavens I used to be SO obsessed with always being on time. Never late, always 10 minutes early at least. Now? I plan to get out for 11am and I’ve barely finger combed my hair by the time I’m supposed to be outside waiting (Sorry Courtney!!!).
Three, maybe even two years ago, the thought of being late used to make me feel physically sick – I’m talking waking up in the night sweating because I had a dream I was late to work! Now, I’m happy to leave the house before 3pm lolllll not even soz.
Being embarrassed doesn’t come easy anymore either. Just earlier, walking home from Asda, I was walking up my road singing very cheerfully ‘There was a little turtle, his name was Tiny Tim’ to entertain my overly tired child. I mean who even am I anymore?! If someone told 15 year old me I’d be that person, well I’d have laughed in your face and called you a twat because I wasn’t the most pleasant 15 y old gal.
Eating out alone used to really give me the fear, now it’s the dreeeeam. Imagine this: you’re alone, in Costa, with a HOT drink and a nice relaxing scroll through Facebook being able to drink your drink whilst it’s still above drinking temperature (F you lukewarm tea) without even having to chase after your escaping toddler every 10 seconds. Paradise, right?!
I have to say my standards are just a little lower in general. Like, 5 second rule? Pahhh please. I’ll eat my son’s leftover dinner pieces if it means I can eat before 7pm. I’m also just glad if my leggings don’t have a big whole in the crotch whereas before I’d never have dreamed of wearing leggings as actual trousers, or if there’s only one snot mark on my ridiculously oversized jumper I’ve probably worn 4 days in a row.
(That’s an exaggeration, I have a weirdly large collection of jumpers.)
Anyway, that’s all for now. I’m pretty happy with the new, unorganised hot mess version of me, and if snotty jumpers and conversation about nappies is what’s keeping me sane, then that’ll be that.
Over and out.
Laura Loveday xo