My Labour Story

It just occurred to me that I never blogged my labour and birthing story, even though I was actually asked to ๐Ÿ™ˆ It’s quite long.. 4 days in fact.. but if you stick around – thanks!

Just a little warning.. it might get a little bit TMI – read on at your own wish ๐Ÿ˜‚ you’ve been warned!

I’ll start with my due date. Fuck, being 40 weeks pregnant is a lot of effort. I secretly thought I’d have him early, but along came my due date of Sunday 9th October and he had no intention of arriving!

The day after, I had a stretch and sweep. I just cringed so hard even thinking about it!

So a week and a day after my due date, 3 more stretch and sweeps, still nothing. I’m due to be induced on the Friday (12 days after due date) and I’m dreading that!

That evening, I finally get a few contractions. My tummy isn’t tightening, so I’m sure they’re not – but my auntie Jade is on FaceTime to me and is laughing at my naivety because she knows they are! They carry on all night, every 5 minutes, but they’re not overly intense so I don’t do anything about them and wait.

I’m gonna cut the story short a bit, now it’s Wednesday morning, I haven’t slept since Monday morning, the contractions are every 5 minutes to the second and fuck me they hurt. It’s all in my back, and I have pelvic pressure pushing down every 3 minutes. It’s hell.

For some unknown reason I’m fully craving battered sausage and chip shop chips, so bless my mum, she gets me some. I’m in the bloody bath, eating battered sausage and chips, contracting every 5 minutes with pelvic pressure pushing down every 3 minutes. I must have looked like a freak. (I ate meat whilst pregnant because I craved it ๐Ÿ˜ท Back to vegan now)

We (me and my mum) headed to the hospital Wednesday around 3am, I’m only 3cm dilated so they really can’t do anything but there’s no way I could make the car journey another two times! I stay, and they admit me to the labour ward.

I spend all evening on the birthing ball and walking around, then on all fours on the hospital bed because I’m sure his head was going to come out there and then. FINALLY at 11pm my waters break and I’ve never been so happy to feel a gush of liquid down my legs.

At this point I’m bloody moaning so loud I’m sure the whole of Kettering heard me – though everyone says I wasn’t as bad as I thought I was I still don’t believe that! But they whizzed me down to the delivery room in a wheelchair after what felt like HOURS of monitoring!

Now I’m BEGGING for an epidural. Back to back labour with back contractions every 2 minutes with pelvic pressure every 1 minute, fuck it couldn’t get worse. The doctors were busy with a queue of women waiting for an epidural, so I swiftly moved on from that and begged the midwife for some pethadine and she gave me a shot of that and gas and air.

Man, pethadine needs street value. That stuff is amazing. I felt nothing after that. I shit you not, one minute I looked at the clock and it was 12pm, I fell asleep, then all of a sudden I wake up to look at the clock and it was 4am.

Here’s what I actually remember from 12-4am whilst dosed up on pethadine and gas and air:
It’s midnight.
It’s now 4am.
I tell my mum she can get free delivery if she orders right now (not a clue).
Oh hi you’re a new midwife.
Yes please I’d like more pethadine.

Aaaaand I’m off again. I’m asleep, but wake up a few times with a massive urge to push. The midwife tells me to push away all I want but it’s just the pelvic pressure and not elijahs head coming out. I honestly thought I’d poo myself (if I did, no one told me!!)

Anyway, I wake up, it’s 8am and two new midwives and my mum are screaming at me to push. What the hell? I push but he isn’t coming. I was sure I couldn’t push him out! No way. Not happening. I remember telling my mum I can’t do it – I think even she was worried I couldn’t the way I was going on about it!

I did manage it though, I managed to push him out with 3 big pushes and only a tiny graze (I’m just a lil smug about that. ๐Ÿ˜) and he’s perfectly healthy and on my chest.

Once the placenta is also delivered (I just vommedย in my mouth thinking about that again) my mum cut the cord five minute later and Elijah rooted around for boob and did the lovely breast crawl. I gave him his first feed and we went from there!

If you read all of that, I applaud you! Good news, I’ve managed to keep us both alive for 6 months. But seriously, that labour has put me off more kids for a long time. I didn’t even get a few hours sleep until Saturday day time – I went 6 days with no sleep apart from the pethadine induced naps! (I was actually awake, I’d just blacked out and it felt like a sleep to me! I was talking away to my mum apparently)

Laura Loveday xo


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